We did not know when the stroke happened to Mom.  I let our greyhound out to run around the backyard and then fed him like any other day.  I headed over to Mom's part of the house to feed the cats and clean the litter boxes like any other day.  I opened the door and looked in at Mom in her bed and like some other days I saw that her legs were hanging out of bed.  I detoured into her room, turned on the light and saw that her legs were not only out from under the covers, but straight out.  I ran to them, saying something like......"oh Mom!  You almost fell out of bed!  I swung her legs back onto the mattress and she said something and then something else and my heart skipped a beat or five.  It was garbled speech.  I asked her to raise her arms over her head.  Her right went right up.  Her left lay lifeless.  I didn't need any more proof........I ran to the phone and called 911.
     The first hospital trama room was filled with people.  They kept asking the same question.  When did this happen?  What time do you think it occurred?  Over and over......every person that we came in contact with asked.  It was heartbreaking for us.  We did not know.  We now know that they were trying to decide if they could administer the clot-busting drug that would have greatly improved her recovery, time and quality-wise.
     The second, big city hospital started the whole process over again.  Cat scan.....other tests, I honestly don't remember how many or which ones.  The neurologists, and there were a few, all felt the need to paint the bleakest picture for the future.....you know.....if she survived the next few hours and then days, since the chance of a second stroke was high in the days ahead, because it was massive, blah, blah, blah........If that wasn't enough, they wanted to know about resusitation a living will.  What was her religion?

Be grateful.  Imagine waking up and not knowing where you are or how you got there. Nothing looks even remotely familiar.  Imagine hearing your name and not knowing who it is that is talking to you.  As you drive to work or school or on errands imagine not recognizing or remembering the nice lady at the coffee shop, the area you are passing through, the house, the yard.  Imagine not recognizing your own room.  And then suddenly you do remember something..........the worst headache you ever had.......and then nothing else.  Be grateful.

For weeks before her massive stroke, Mom was not quite herself.  Never one to complain, she was losing interest in eating.  We were scratching our heads and tempting her with all kinds of food....her favorite things....each day at every meal.  For the first time in my life she was just pushing the food around on the plate, or dumping it out completely and washing her dish so we wouldn't know.  In fact, on Thanksgiving she actually spent a lot of time cutting up a green bean from the traditional casserole. You get the idea.  She was falling asleep at the table while waiting for dessert to be served. We got her back to her room and sitting comfortably in her recliner.  After cleaning up and while my husband took his mom home, I scooped up Mom and took her for a ride...her favorite thing on earth.  So glad now that we had that ride together.

On the day after Thanksgiving 2015 my Mom had a stroke.  That was the start of a journey that continues to this day.  Mom is 88 years old, a survivor of colon cancer, the 50's and 60's and electric shock therapy for post partum depression.  She was feeling more and more tired each day for a few weeks before and her once voracious appetite had dwindled substantially.  Two weeks before when at the doctor's office we were told that......well, she is 88.....her blood tests were fine 6 months ago.......Etc., etc.   She was in AFIB.  Arterial Fibrillation......the heart receives too many signals to beat, leading to irregular heartbeat and blood collection which forms a clot and Presto!  A clot shoots out and, in this case, races to the right side of the brain causing a "massive" stroke.  The doc did not detect it.  We don't go there anymore.